Embrace Your Fear 👻

Issue #10 : It may sound strange, but my fear of failing helped me succeed.

Fear plays a big role in every decision we make (or don't make). Usually, we look at fear as a weakness and try everything in our control not to face it. 

It may sound strange, but my fear of failing helped me succeed. 

I was born in poverty and lived in a slum growing up. The financial burden of sending three kids to school was a lot for my parents. 

Failing or performing poorly on exams meant the end of schooling and education. Hence, my winning strategy was to avoid failing on exams at all costs. 

So not losing is a much stronger motivator than winning for me. 

Many things motivate us. But the most powerful motivator is fear which triggers more adrenaline than any other emotion.

This is what I’ve learned from facing fear in my life and business: 

1. Fear is not a weakness; it's a survival mechanism. 

   
   — It keeps us alive from any possible danger. 

   — It's a key to unlocking our reserved energy tank (adrenaline).
   — It heightens our senses and awareness.   
   

2. A healthy dose of fear is beneficial.
   

   — Fear prepares us not to fail... and if we don't fail, we win. 
   — It keeps us humble and grounded.
   — It inspires us to create a plan to increase our success chances.
   

3. All we want in our life is the other side of our fear. 
   
   — (Fear) Public speaking → (Desire) Become a successful leader. 
   — (Fear) Drowning in water → (Desire) Learn to swim. 

   — (Fear) Failing on an exam → (Desire) Graduate from college. 

4. We fear the most at the beginning of learning new things, but we conquer our fear with practice, preparation, and repetition.
   
   — (Beginning) Learning to drive → (After) Driving becomes effortless.  

   — (Beginning) Learning a new language → (After) Able to have a comfortable conversation with a native speaker.

   — (Beginning) Starting a new habit → (After) It becomes second nature for most. 

How can you embrace fear?  When you experience fear, acknowledge it and try to change your thinking. Below are four common types of fear and suggestions to reframe them. 

1. Fear of Failure: (Thought) What if I can't make this work? → (Solution) What can go wrong?
   

2. Fear of Ridicule: (Thought) What if people judge me for doing this? → (Solution) Are these people better than you? Take feedback from a small trusted group, and improve.
   

3. Fear of Uncertainty: (Thought) What if it turns out to be a wrong decision? → (Solution) How bad would it be if it’s wrong? How great it would be if you were right? What's the cost of not trying?
   

4. Fear of Success: (Thought) What if I can't balance power with responsibility? → (Solution) You can hire a consultant or coach to guide you.  

📋 This fear-setting exercise, suggested by Tim Ferriss, might help to face the fears.

Happy Halloween 🎃

He who is not everyday conquering some fear has not learned the secret of life.  — Ralph Waldo Emerson

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